Processing....

We're all here and okay...just processing losing my big brother.

On Friday, Evan and I sat Marino down to tell him Brendan had died. We had seen Paranorman when we were in Dallas, which is about a boy who has the ability to see ghosts, including his late grandmother, who watches zombie movies on tv with him. The first thing Marino asked me was if Uncle Brendan was now a ghost and if he would watch tv on the couch with us. We explained ghosts are not real, but my sister-in-law and I had a little laugh that night over the thought, since we think Brendan would quite enjoy getting to be a ghost, particularly if it meant he got to sit on our couch and watch zombie movies with us (he loved zombie movies!).

He has asked me a few times if Uncle Brendan's "regular voice" was gone and if his "sick voice" was gone, too. Its interesting how much of an impression Brendan's voice made on him. The cancer drastically changed Brendan's voice and made it hard for him to speak, but Marino didn't mention it to me at all while we were there or when we came home. We feel like he doesn't always "get it" (he keeps asking if Uncle Brendan is still sick) but he seems to understand it a bit more as we discuss it more.